Cool Change

Let's review the past year, shall we. After building the most comprehensive system of care for the poor and the mentally ill in the nation, a piece of it collapsed under the weight of its own success.

It was brought down by short sighted bureaucrats, narrow minded providers who failed to grasp the significance of what is was, and by selfish competitors. While it was not perfect, it was the best that the country has yet to achieve for these very sick and needy people. Then it crashed and burned in a very public way.

I was made the scape goat, which is fine as it goes with the job. Anytime you try something that's never been done before you run the risk of being blamed if it fails. It did and I was.

In my 20 years at Union Mission, I had accomplished something that I had yet to achieve. I had failed. It left me devastated.

Then it was discovered that the leader of our finance team had stopped paying payroll taxes, in part to support the massive amount of services for the poor. Overnight I learned that we were $2.3 Million in debt to the government. Betrayal was added to devastation.

So the first six months of the year were spent working through these things. And we did. Then my father died. It was a sweet passing but grief was added to the things that I was already dealing with.

Over the last six months, I have worked hard to correct all of the things that had gone wrong. And we have been successful expanding health care services, housing options, and rebuilding an infrastructure for mental health services.

Then my private life began to experience a transition that I had not planned for and I find myself with more closet space than I'll ever need. And loss was added to the things that I faced. At times all of this became unbearable, but somehow I bore it.

I bore it because of the grace and support of far too many people to mention. But it was a community of believers who got me through. They believed in me. They believed in the things that I was doing. And magically each showed up at just the right time doing just the right things to get me here.

Now I am ready for a cool change, as the song title goes.

"Now that my life is so prearranged
I know that its time for a cool change
Wel I was born in the sign of the water
And it is there that I feel my best"

Throughout my career I have challenged my co-workers to embrace change. For the first time, I have fought it. Then I remembered my Dad dying. He had always been afraid of death but when the time came, he embraced it and brought peace to all of us.

So I am staring at change in the face right now and only have one thing left to say. "Come here bitch! Let's dance!"